Getting a Second Cat

[Barbara]

I adopted 2 male kitten siblings seven years ago and they were neutered at the appropriate age. They were very best friends and loved each other dearly as well as loving their human family (my husband and me). They played together, groomed each other, slept together etc. They were really best buds. A year ago last July I lost one of the brothers to cancer. We tried desperately to save this cat. We took him to the specialist recommended by our vet but he just didn't make it. The male brother I still have was the Alpha cat of the two. I want to get another cat now to add to our family. I want the new cat to be a friend to the 7 year old male cat that I now have and I also want the cat for myself and hubby. I feel the cat I now have as well as myself have grieved long enough for the brother and the pet that we lost in a matter of a couple of months. This is the very first time in my entire life as a small child growing up into a retired citizen that I have only had one cat. I know I am ready to add another cat to our family. I have done a lot of thinking about the new cat we will adopt. Since my cat was the Alpha cat and is an adult male it seems to me that a kitten would be easier to fit into my cat's life as a companion. Wouldn't a kitten be more apt to accept an older cat also? The cat I have now was with his brother for 6 years. Do you think a male or a female cat would be more acceptable for my cat and do you agree it will be easier to fit in a kitten as part of the family instead on adopting an adult cat? It seems to me if I brought in another adult cat perhaps both cats might feel threated. I do want them to adjust and be good friends. I really think the cat I have now misses his brother and the interaction he had with the other cat. Of course the cat that I will adopt I will have spayed or nuetered at the appropriate age. What is your advice of adding a new cat? Male or female? Kitten or adult? I would appreciate your advice and thoughts on getting another cat?
Thanks for your input.

[bobbie]

IMHO A kitten will drive a 7 yr old male Wacko. Perhaps a female maybe docile around 3 yrs old would B a happier choice. It will take a little while for the 2 to become friendly or may not. If getting from shelter, please get clause allowing them to bring back if not workable for exchange as well as remember URI runs rampart in shelters so a vet vist with blood work is in order. Your decision . Also a cat rescue has already done all testing and spay/neuter, shots etc and usually are in super health prior to an adoption. Please keep us posted as to your decision. All recues here have also done microchipping. hugs, bobbie

[Hedgewitch]

I just added a kitten to my home and I have older cats, much older than your cat. 7 is not old by any means. A kitten may just liven him up again after he gets over the fact you dared to get another cat. I don't think a male or a female matters one way or another since you will be fixing it. Just don't wait past 4.5 months to fix it or there is a chance of a heat with a female. Some girls are early.

Your 7 year old will have his nose out of joint for a long time but he will get over it. My 13 year old hated the new kitten. She boxed his ears for the first 4 months he was here. Not hard, she would run and get high out of his way. She made lou threatening sounds, she hid, glared, and made terrible faces, but now she does all those things in play with him. Until she sees we are watching and then she pretends she wants nothing to do with the young whipper snapper, and then struts off with her tail all fluffed out, only to dash off chasing him in the next room.


Our 14 year old loved him after the first hour and started to bath him as if he had always been here. they sleep together and eat together. All cats are different. My 14 year old is a Tonk male and they all love kittens. I wish you lots of fun and laughter with who ever you bring into you home and heart.

[tbt]

Bobbie has some really good points to consider. Just how active is your 7 year old? If he is a very active and energetic cat, then a younger, submissive companion might be the ticket - maybe an older kitten. If he is laid back and not very active, then an older companion might be a good fit - one a few years old. You can generally get a feel for how cats get along if the shelter has them in a community setting. Seeing how they interact or react to other cats helps immensely. When I adopted my second male, I was worried about my 4 year old alpha male at home, who has always been very aggressive and territorial. And his only mate has been a 6-year old female. I watched the new prospect for about 30 minutes in a community setting at the shelter. He seemed indifferent to the other cats, neither aggressive, nor passive. In fact, nothing appeared to bother him at all. Perfect fit. His indifferent attitude won over my male cat within a day. We tried the slow and easy introductions, but my alpha was so eager to meet that he ran into the room between my feet and began grooming the new one within a day. My female was not so pleased, but after a few weeks, she accepted him. In fact, now the two males are buds, and my alpha will "protect" the new one from my female when she gets into one of her fight-picking moods. All three will race about, tearing up the house, up and down the stairs, playing chase. That was why I asked how active yours is.

I'd opt for a male. Of all the cats I've had in the past, my experience has been that males generally are more accepting than females. I've never had problems bonding two different male cats, but have had problems with females. Others here have had different experiences.

They key to acceptance whether you choose a male or female, kitten or adult, is the way they are introduced. Keep the new one isolated in a "safe" room for about a week. This safe room must have a litterbox and food for the new one. Allow each cat to sniff each other under the door, or between the crack of the door. After a day or so, take out the new one and put him in a room where your current cat has been. Put your current cat in the safe room and let him get familiar with your new cat's smells, litterbox, etc. Smell is tremendously important to cats. Then put them back in their respective areas. Do this through the week, and when you think the time is right, allow face to face meeting, but supervise. There will be obligatory hissing and snarling, but as long as there is no blood drawn, this is normal. I've found male cats are more curious, and when they figure out there is no threat, they will settle down. Lavish both with love and praise, show no favoritism, and you will soon see a new side to your 7 year old.
Please keep us posted. We love to hear about adoptions and how they went.
Tracy.

[K.Novey]

Well this has been my experience. I had my oldest for two years before the little one (who is now my oldest) they were together for 7 years before the passing. After months I adopted another cat (well a girl kitten) boy was he miffed for about a week then you kept out of the way when those two were playing tag or you'd become part of the race track. He taught (passed on) all kinds of good and bad behavior which has been a joy. Recently I extended my family to 3 cats, a male kitten, my oldest really wants nothing to do with him though I do catch him given him a bath (of course the kitten is sound asleep) but most of the time he just growls at him or boxes his ears. My little girl whose only 2 has been the playmate companion for the little guy since he came into my home, those two do almost everything together.

It all depends on the cat, as my brother got two a boy and a girl who definitely didn't care for each other at first but now are best of friends so long as they don't have to share my brother’s lap. So I wish you the best of luck and just take it one day at a time.

K

[tbt]

Big Awe factor there K.

I could just see Smokey cleaning the little guy, then when caught in the act, look all huffy like, "I didn't do that." And the part about passing on good and bad habits, I forgot about that. You are so right. My 4 year old male never, ever begged or ate human food until I adopted the second male, who loooooves human food.

I just love reading about everyone's different experiences with new cats and kittens.

Tracy.

[Belles]

Barbara, I had a similar experience, although my cats weren't 7 at the time. They were two. Both males and best buddies. (although they didn't start out that way, even though they were introduced as 6 month old kittens). My Charlie bear died and left Smudge all alone.. mopey and sad. We thought a new kitten would liven and perk him up. So we adopted an all -black kitten (male) from the shelter, but he HATED this kitten. Growled at him and was constantly threatening him. Turned out this kitten was ill from the shelter and dying.. despite getting him to the vet and doing all the right things, we lost this kitty. So I decided to get another.. this time it was a female calico/burmese cross. She was just a tiny little thing and when I brought her home, she wasn't going to take his growling and huffing.. LOL. Instead, she climbed up in his cat tree and said, "I'm HERE!! Move Over!" She never was afraid of him and within a day he was smitten with her.. followed her around, loved on her, protected her.

I don't know why he rejected that other kitten, perhaps sensing he was ill. I am not sure that I would put much stock into what kind, kitten or older.. I mean there are all sorts of cat rescues that introdcue new cats constantly... how do they manage? I don't know there is any magical formula. Just use caution during introductions..

Of course, I'm not a cat expert, but I don't think it's all that complex.

[Barbara]

My 7 year old cat is a Rex rescue and he is very active. These were the first Devon Rexes that I have ever had, but their personalities are so different than the other cats I have had in my lifetime. For one thing my cat is still so active and loves to play. Even though he was the Alpha cat of the two brothers, he still likes to be loved, sit in laps for petting and purring time, still loves to climb like he did when he was little (climbs everything really-even walks the door tops),loves playing hide and seek and chasing through the house like a blurry streak. If you read about the Devons they are highly active little pixies most all of their lives and that pretty much describes exactly the cat I have now. He and his brother were so active in playing together which is another reason I feel that the cat that I have now needs another playmate like him. I do plan on contacting the Devon Rescue group again and feel the kitten won't be a newly weaned kitten but an older kitten. I just don't know whether to look for another male or a female or a kitten or a mature cat. I really think the cat I have now will enjoy the activity and playtime of a kitten as he is so active in his play. Actually, my Devon does not sleep nearly the amount of time as my other cats in the past have. He wants to be doing something all the time. Hopefully, instead of waking me in the night to play he will wake the new cat that we add to our family. You know, I do really want another cat, but I do think getting another cat will be good for the cat I have now too. I am just trying to find out if a male or a female would be better and if an older kitten or a mature adult would be better so that the cats can become best friends and playmates. Of course, I do expect some hissing and boxing of the ears etc. at first until they do get to know and accept each other and realize there will have to be supervised play sessions at first.
I'm like you, Belles, in wondering what the magical formula is for cats getting to know one another at the rescues and shelter sites. It seems like the getting along always works out for them and I just really appreaciate all the tips you all can give me in adjusting a second cat into my home and into the life of the cat I have now.
Thanks, too, for all the tips and suggestions at how to introduce them to each other.
All your knowledge that all of you can share with me is deeply appreciated.